Dear Dumbass in Charge of Company Policy,
Last night I went to Target with my mother in law, Vernie. We oohhed and ahhhed over all your 'cute' clothes, we couldn't believe those fabulous towels were on sale for 8.99, we scored our favorite make up and even a candle or two. And then, I went in search of a perfect fit new bra! Because you are Target, and because you have such great selections I knew I would find a match. I spent at least 15 mins in great dialouge with Vern as we approached each bra rack and debated over lace vs plain, padding vs no padding, racer back vs regular. etc etc. I finally narrowed my selections down to 5 bras, convinced that among them was THE ONE! Now it was time for the test drive!
We made our way over to the fitting rooms where we were greeted by a friendly woman who told me I could only take 6 items in. Great! I had 6 to be exact. I was so excited!! Then as I am walking away the lady says to me 'Just make sure you keep YOUR bra on when you try on those'. HUH? Okay, I'm sorry. Now I can understand you not wanting cooch juice on your panties, no one likes to buy crusty thongs....and that's okay because i can get a pretty good sense of whether those panties will fit over my own. BUT A BRA??? When I asked the woman to explain, she told me it was 'company policy', that when you try on a bra WITHOUT anything underneath your perfume can get on the bra, and customers don't like that. OMG. You can't be serious Target? And OBVIOUSLY a woman had nothing to do with this company policy. Because anyone with HALF A FUCKING BRAIN would know that a bra is not a pair of underwear. A bra holds boobies. It has to support, it has to feel comfortable, it has FORM TO YOUR BOOBY....and how the hell does one know if the bra fits your booby when you have another bra on???? AND GOD FORBID you are a padded kinda girl, looking to go SHEER and you happen to have worn one of your padded bras to Target...oh that will work out great!
Target, this is very dissapointing. And I am starting a boycott on your bras. I am putting this letter on my blog, which is very popular, and you will see what a grievous mistake you have made. I may never look at you the same...
Sincerely
I Don't Need Your Fucking Bra Anyway!
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