Dear Mens,
I am about to tell you something that will get you laid more often. It's REALLY REALLY SIMPLE. And the sooner you get it figured out...the happier your woman will be. And we all know that a happy woman, is a happy man. Now. You may have heard this before, and you may have thought it too much work...but I'm here to tell you it is SO EFFECTIVE. So...write it down, take a picture...I don't give a fuck. Here you go:
CALL.
Thats it. C-A-L-L. When your woman says call. CALL. Find a phone, we don't care if its yours or not, and CALL. If you are going to be late. CALL. If you are stuck in a traffic jam and its going to be an hour until you get home, CALL. If you are out in the woods and a beaver starts chewing on your leg and your buddies have to take you to the ER, CALL. If you are out with your friends, having a good time, and the time you agreed you would be home with your woman is slowly approaching and you want to stay out late...CALL. If your woman asks you for nothing more than 1 phone call a day when you are away on business or PLAYING ON ROCKS in the desert for weeks, CALL. If you get too drunk, CALL. WHEN IN DOUBT....whats the word? CALL!!!
When you call...this is what happens. We think you care. We think you are thinking about us. We think you are considerate. We think that you are holding your end up of the bargain. We think that you have respect for our time. We think that you get that you are in relationship and its not just about you. We are happy you are honest with us, and usually wind up being more generous and understanding towards your needs. It's a win win...really. But you have to call.
And thats how you get more sex. You will forever only get laid once a month, until you figure this out. I PROMISE you good things come to those who call. I also promise you that when you don't call when you have been asked to call, you will be in the shithouse.
Sincerely,
A wise woman.
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