My first online dating experience went down over Thanksgiving of 1999. I had recently been given a computer for my birthday and discovered 'chat rooms'. This was back when the only thing you ever heard about meeting people online was that it was very very dangerous. That people misrepresented themselves, and you were likely talking to a Jeffrey Dahmer. I have never been intimidated by popular opinion. Nor do I think too much of my safety when it comes to trusting complete strangers.
I met a dude who lived in Boston. Can't remember his name. He was in the Reserves. I thought that was sexy. I was 20 years old at the time and I had just broken up with The Porn Star. This was also back when the only pictures you could share online had to either be scanned (poorly at that) or taken by a webcam. I bought a webcam. Yes I took pictures of my boobs, just to see what they would look like on the computer. But I never sent them to anyone. I don't think. Anyway.
Dude and I spent lots of nights till 3am talking on the phone, convincing ourselves and eachother that we were destined for one another. We had to meet! But how? I considered leaving one night during a phone call at that very moment to start driving towards him. We would meet halfway! No...I couldn't miss school. Thanksgiving break was around the corner, and in prediction of impulsive behavior I told my family I would NOT be coming home for the holidays. Long story short. Dude wound up driving his ass to Florida from Massachusetts. You can mapquest that. The night he was to arrive was Thanksgiving and I had prepared us a feast! I got a phone call from Dude saying his car had broken down somewhere in South Carolina and he didn't know what to do. He thought about going home, but he didn't. He left his car on the side of the road and got on a GREYHOUND to Tallahassee. I picked him up the next morning. He was THRILLED to see me. I was. Not impressed.
Great. 3 days with dude that is 20 lbs heavier than all two of his pictures showed. And his grill was messed up. But he was very sweet.
3 long days later, I dropped him off at the Greyhound station for Boston. End of story.
And now I know you are wondering 'So did you give dude Happy Ending for having to leave his broken down car in South Carolina and ride a GREYHOUND 20+ hours all the way home to Boston or what?'. And the answer is no. Although I was GUILTED by my friends (ahem...Hillary) into some fourplay acting. Mercy, mercy.
Jayne, you are the winner, and recipient - of The Worlds Ugliest Felted Purse. Congratulations.
